Having Respectful Dialogues: City of God
So we are reading the novel City of God, and this book talks about very serious topics that were apparent at that time. There are two identities that are often denied within the Chicano community: homosexuality and having AIDS. Therefore, this novel mostly revolves around the intersection between race and sexuality. We as seniors as well as human beings are very mature, and I am wondering- how can we have a serious discussion about this book, and ask questions, and bring up theories, and how can we form them so that it is not disrespectful? Considering these are major topics to talk about in class. After coming back from SDLC, where I joined the LGBTQIA+ affinity group, and where I had been given the opportunity to engage in discussions about these topics I gained a deeper understanding, not only of the necessity of these conversations but also of the language that is appropriate when having these discussions. I want to be able to have these discussions with not only members of that community, but people that are not part of it so that we can have a very valuable discussion. With the novel that we are now reading, that we have not discussed yet, how can we as class talk about topics such as AIDS, homosexuality, sex, and death in a way that it is respectful as well as engaging?
I think this question and the other one are very similar so I would recommend reading the other blog post responses in addition to the ones left on this thread as well. I think that talking about topics with people in the community but also those who are not in the community adds an interesting and complicated layer to talking about difficult topics. Like the speaker we had the other week said, I think that those inside of groups should speak with "I" while those outside the group should speak in a way that affirms that they are not part of that group. As a person that rarely faces discrimination due to my skin color, gender, sexuality, and many other traits, I find myself on the outside of these groups. I have struggled with speaking in these dialogues because I feel very different from the people affected. I think it is always helpful to speak from experience in these situations.
ReplyDeleteI think that the most effective way to have a serious discussion about a book that deals with “difficult” topics is to try and be as thoughtful and respectful as possible. I think it is important for us as a class to engage in a conversation where there are not only active participants but also active listeners who are equally as engaged but not as vocal. I think that as a class we need to step back and start having more meaningful dialogues where we try to offer more considerate perspectives that are backed up with evidence either textual or first-hand experiences. As I said in the last blog post, I think that active participants should attempt to think about what they are going to say before spouting out a response in order to be as thoughtful as possible. City of Angels is a space where we can talk about these difficult topics in hopes of not feeling judged or criticized and I hope we can maintain this goal of the class. I think it important to hear a variety of perspectives even when it comes to difficult topics such as race, gender, and sexuality. However, I think it is important for those who these situations don’t completely pertain to…to try and participate in a respectful manner.
ReplyDeleteTalking about this topic, especially since many people in the class aren’t a part of this group, I think this goes back to respecting each other and THOROUGHLY thinking about what you say before you say it. Intent vs. impact is also a very important theme in discussions like these. Not only is it important to formulate your thoughts before you speak, but to also take into consideration how other could take that. On the other end, I also think that if someone says the wrong terminology or isn’t pc, the first thing to do isn’t to start blowing up and making accusations but rather educate them on the correct terminology and have a discussion around that. Some people may not know the correct way to say things and I am pretty confident that the people in our class don’t want to intentionally hurt or make anyone uncomfortable. It’s also important that in order to have a rich and valuable discussion the first priority should be to make sure everyone is respectful, but not to monitor and censor every word that comes out of everyone’s mouth. When we take so much time to correct what people say rather than actually discussing the topic, that’s when the discussion becomes less valuable. Overall I think everyone in our class has good judgement, respect and curiosity for our conversations about this to be very meaningful.
ReplyDeleteWell first off, I think it would be awesome if you could share some of the things you talked about at SDLC so that we can hear how you all were respectful when discussing these topics. I think one big thing we can do is respect everyone's opinion. I view certain topics differently than you do and differently than Dr. Stogdill or Ms. Gladden do. We are all living different truths, but they are all valuable in their own way. If we can learn to understand each persons point of view and allow for conversations to form out of curiosity of each of our experiences than we can have effective discussions. I also think that while it is immensely important to hear the point of views of people who are directly involved in a situation but equally valuable to hear what those on the "outside" think. I am excited to dive into these topics and hear what everyone has to say!
ReplyDeleteI think in order for a safe space to be created we all must value each others opinions and we must take all of the discussions and topics that are brought up seriously. If we as a class are able to listen to each other then we can have respectful conversations. Allowing everybody to speak whatever they feel like sharing I also think is an important value that needs to be restored in the class. If we all are able to speak what comes to our mind or what we think is interesting, I feel like this will open up many deeper discussions or topics that we can dive into as a class.
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ReplyDeleteI think it's really important that as a class we find an effective and respectful way to have these dialogues. It's important that we make space for voices that can speak from the “I” perspective, and like Ella said, for those of us who cant for a certain dialogue we need to find ways to participate in a thoughtful manner. It's important that we hear all voices. Hearing and agreeing are very different. I think it's important that we listen respectfully to everyones opinion, but if this opinion is one that people find problematic I believe it's equally as important to disagree and push back on opinions.
This class has become a class where we can discuss issues we aren't given the opportunity to in other settings, and I hope this remains the case. I value the conversations we have in this class, and I think if we can all focus on being thoughtful and thinking before we speak, this can remain a space for thoughtful and safe dialogues.
I think we can talk about such topics whenever we have the opportunity to. In terms of homosexuality and AIDS, I believe these topics will come up in the next book because it discusses it, thus giving our class an opportunity do discuss it. I also believe that in the second semester we are going to focus a lot more on public health and I'm sure that AIDS and the gay community will come up more then. I believe that we can focus on these topics in the future in a respectful manner by simply accepting everyone's different ideas on the topic and learn from them. We don't need to put down others, and we also need to be respectful of everyone's identity. We should always remember to think before we speak, because if you don't think about an idea carefully enough, you have the potential of being disrespectful to or even trigger somebody. These conversations have so much potential because our class is such a diverse group of people, but we need to focus on being respectful to everybody in order for the dialogues to reach the MAX POTENTIAL.
ReplyDeleteI agree with what everyone above is saying. Above all, we need to be respectful of everyone's perspectives and ideas. That said, when we speak up in group dialogues, especially those confronting difficult topics, we need to think about what we're going to say before contributing. This is not to say we shouldn't speak from the heart or voice our individual opinions, but we should be thoughtful in doing so. With discussion surrounding race, gender, sexuality, etc., we need to be especially careful about how we approach each topic. I think we should speak from the "I" perspective instead of assuming that everyone has the same experiences. Also, as was said in a previous dialogue about race, if you don't identify with a particular form of identity, you shouldn't try to speak on it. It is important to offer your perspective, but not try to add to the conversation in a way that makes you seem as if you understand the experiences of someone with that particular identity. In this instance, it is important to listen and respect rather than to try to relate and understand. I'm excited to see what our group discussions on City of God will bring and how we can all contribute our unique perspectives to form productive dialogue.
ReplyDeleteI think that, as someone who does not identify as LGBTQ+ or Chicano, my priority should be to listen. However, listening does not mean letting someone else take up all the space who also does not identify with those categories. If I feel like the dialogue is meandering or avoiding touchy topics, I am going to speak up. I do not consider keeping the class on track disrespectful. I do not have patience for insignificant or perhaps racist ideas. To me, means amplifying LGBTQ+ and Chicano voices. I am here to participate in whatever way most supports those voices. I don't think that it is my job to determine what's respectful, so instead I will listen to you and others. The one thing I think I can contribute, though, is direct textual evidence, off of which I ask questions. I will try to be respectful, and I hope that we can create an environment that is forgiving of mistakes if someone slips up.
ReplyDeleteOnce again, I believe the facilitation of such discussion is critical. The facilitator must understand that these conversations are critical and therefore must leave room for students to interact with each other independent of their own personal beliefs. On top of this everyone should be speaking from the "I" perspective to avoid generalizations and acting as if someone who is not a part of a specific group is actually part of a group. What everyone has said above me makes sense and is reasonable. I think in general this class specifically has done a pretty good job at being respectful but we still have room to go. City of God however will be a good test to how our group cooperates and discusses somewhat difficult material. Im excited.
ReplyDeleteTalking about these topics can be tough, and can be uncomfortable with people who may have not experienced them in their lives. I know for me, in the past, it has been very easy for me to discuss death, but that is because I had never experienced what real death feels like. This is same sort of feeling can be applied to any topic and any person within a dialogue.
ReplyDeleteOne of the ways to combat that uncomfortability with these topics can be to actively engage in the text and possibly to do outside research as well with the topics that one does not fully understand. Additionally, I think that it can be beneficial if those who do identify with the topics that we are discussing could maybe share their experiences discussing the topics in order to give us some context to approach the dialogue with. Respect is the most important idea that can be honored in these conversations, by letting voices with experience speak. I am someone who may not entirely understand some of the topics that we will discuss, so I will listen, absorb, and engage when I feel it is necessary for me to speak.
I think we need to be conscious and intentional when we speak. We should be speaking from our heart, but just as you do -- or could be doing -- in your daily life: say what you mean, but be wary of your audience. We have to understand that everyone is coming from different places, has difference opinions on everything, and we all react differently. As Kate spoke about above, there are certain territories that don't allow everyone to "speak from the heart" because not everyone shares the same experiences and especially with identity -- race, sexuality and gender -- the conversation isn't always necessarily the platform for your voice. As we begin to dive into City of God, I will focus on being a reader of the book and a listener of the conversation. As we move through probable discomfort, we must be aware of when and where we have a stance in the conversation. That doesn't mean if you can't "relate" don't speak up, just that we should lead with respectful and productive curiosity and support for one another throughout the process.
ReplyDeleteJust as Halston commented on how our class discussions do not sugarcoat the truth, I am not going to sugarcoat it either: the topics of sex and sexuality in general inspire discomfort. However, in order to have a productive conversation, I believe we need to move past this stage of uneasiness and awkwardness and understand the value an open conversation could bring us. We should think about and maybe even explore why certain topics make us uncomfortable so as to come to a better understanding and then move forward with the discussion, and we should listen carefully and respectfully to the perspectives others bring and of their distinctive experiences in handling such conversation. Like Jeilani, I also think it would be incredibly valuable to hear about and learn what language is deemed appropriate when discussing sexuality and topics that one either can or cannot directly associate with. I look forward to actively listening and engaging in an thought-provoking discussion in class tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteIn order to have the most serious discussions we can and get the most out of the novel, we, as a class, must listen to each other and avoid jumping to conclusions. We need to let people speak openly and explain the things that they are thinking about. The topics presented in City of God are undoubtedly going to be difficult/weird to talk about in an open dialogue, and it is our duty as both facilitators and participants in the dialogue to promote an environment that people feel comfortable speaking and sharing. If people don't feel comfortable sharing opinions/theories, then how are we going to have productive dialogue about uncomfortable topics?
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